Hope is a Valid Coping Mechanism

Principles

So many parents have expressed how the election results have hit harder this year compared to previous years. It makes sense. We want a better world for our children, and its heart-wrenching when their future seems dimmed.

In these dark moments, hope is a valid coping mechanism. Hope isn’t about putting a smile on your face and crossing your fingers that things will get better. Instead, hope is about proactively facing the uncertainty of the future. This could look like:

• Regulating your emotions: Do the things that make you feel like you. Move your body. Listen to music. Craft. Find reasons to smile and laugh.
• Connecting with your values: While the election results may feel like direct attack on your values, your values still matter. Your heart and soul are wise guides for your efforts
• Connecting with your community: Find solace in sharing and feeling together. Connect with family, friends, neighbors, and other community members. You may find a nugget of inspiration from these conversations. We’re stronger together!
• Taking action: Parenting is inherently an act of hope. As one parent told her 7-year-old, “No matter who is president, our job is to be the helpers and to help those who need to be lifted up. This election doesn’t change who we are and what our roles are in this world.”

A Few Perspectives

Jenny Lawson, journalist, author and blogger, highlights the value of deep sadness:

Without the dark there isn’t light. Without the pain there is no relief. And I remind myself that I’m lucky to be able to feel such great sorrow, and also such great happiness. I can grab on to each moment of joy and live in those moments because I have seen the bright contrast from dark to light and back again. I am privileged to be able to recognize that the sound of laughter is a blessing and a song, and to realize that the bright hours spent with my family and friends are extraordinary treasures to be saved, because those same moments are a medicine, a balm. Those moments are a promise that life is worth fighting for, and that promise is what pulls me through when depression distorts reality and tries to convince me otherwise.
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from Furiously Happy: A Funny Book About Horrible Things

Anne Lamott, author, political activist, public speaker, and writing teacher, reminds us that hope can carry us through dark times:

Hope is not about proving anything. It's about choosing to believe this one thing, that love is bigger than any grim, bleak shit anyone can throw at us.

from Plan B: Further Thoughts on Faith

Pause for Reflection

What brings you hope?

Continue this reflection in the Moment for Parents app.